Funny BSers busted
- Thread starter bfdlad
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I was playing this old banger, and he sees me play, and that usually gets them to start talking to me, he said he was in a game one time with this guy playing for 500, and he lost and had to give up his cuetec to cover the bet, I said so you still owe the guy 350?
The Customer Is Always Right!
I was selling Talisman tips at VF several years ago. A guy came up and asked about the Talisman WB's.
He asked: "Are these Talismans, or are they Water Buffalos?"
I explained that Talisman was the brand, and water buffalo was the material.
He said: "Don't tell me about water buffalo, I've been playing with them for years."
So I assured him that they were Water Buffalo.
He decided that he wanted one, so I turned them over to show the "M" on one, and the "H" on the other.
He picked up the one with the "H" on it and said: "I'll take the HEAVY one."
I was selling Talisman tips at VF several years ago. A guy came up and asked about the Talisman WB's.
He asked: "Are these Talismans, or are they Water Buffalos?"
I explained that Talisman was the brand, and water buffalo was the material.
He said: "Don't tell me about water buffalo, I've been playing with them for years."
So I assured him that they were Water Buffalo.
He decided that he wanted one, so I turned them over to show the "M" on one, and the "H" on the other.
He picked up the one with the "H" on it and said: "I'll take the HEAVY one."
Come on ,you don't know earl rodrigues?I figured you would be the on to knowBlackjack said:About a year ago, I had some idiot come into the pool hall. He's back there on one of the tables missing every other shot. Every so often he kept looking over to the bar to see if we were looking when he actually pocketed a ball. When he did pocket the ball, he strutted around the table like the big rooster in the pen. I didn't pay him any mind, he was just shooting with his girlfriend - I figured he was just a punk trying to impress her.
So, as he was on his way out, he's paying for the table and he sees my cue behind the bar and he complimented it. He started to tell me how he almost went pro but he was too good, how he's beat a lot of the top pros (wow - I had a top roadie in my room and didn't even know it)... and that back home in "Kentucky" he has his own expensive cue. Yep. It's a "Ball-a-reen" and it's worth almost $15,000, which is why he keeps it back in "Kentucky" (Fort Knox, I figured).
He then tells me that he was watching me play the night before last and that if I would practice a little bit more, that someday I might be as good as he is, or as good as some of those pros you see on TV, like "Earl Rodriguez". (who the hell is Earl Rodriguez?)
I put the balls up, cashed him out, gave him his change, the whole time, just biting my tongue and trying real hard not to laugh out loud.
As the guy is walking out, one of my regulars was sitting at the bar with a smile on his face and says, "When it comes to piling up the manure, his mouth sure ain't got nuttin' on a elephant's a$$, huh Dave? Think he wants to play some?"
This kid stopped dead in his tracks, looked at both of us. Then he looked at his girlfriend. She looked at us. We looked back at her... his face turned red as an apple and he ran out of there as fast as he could. He was halfway across the parking lot before she was half way to the door. Never saw him again.
LILJOHN30 said:Come on ,you don't know earl rodrigues?I figured you would be the on to know
He wouldn't knock a front door.
He must not know what he is talking about, Everyone knows that Earl Rodriguez ran 97 racks back to back, he did it after his arm amputation and while he was sick with the flu. He also had one eye closed due to pink eye. I was there I saw it myself I have the cue he used and he got it from Fats. I held the money and when I asked he wanted the 7 so I let it go. This was in 1935.LILJOHN30 said:Come on ,you don't know earl rodrigues?I figured you would be the on to know
Holy crap... you guys have to quit.... I just spit wine all over my keyboard.... third time this week.... I'm still laughing..... Cut It Out....
Not exactly a BSer, but...I was playing a guy one night who was a good bit better than me, and I knew he was holding back. He was decent at it, but I could tell when he shifted to miss or thought about a miss that would leave him safe. At some point I asked him how long he had been playing, and he said "Oh, only a few years." I said sure ok like I didn't believe him.
I let some time pass so he could releax, then commented on how nice his cue was, and asked him how old it was. He immediately smiled with pride and as he told me he had owned it 14 years....
Kelly
I let some time pass so he could releax, then commented on how nice his cue was, and asked him how old it was. He immediately smiled with pride and as he told me he had owned it 14 years....
Kelly
Mike Templeton said:
(Showing my musical ignorance) Isn't Billie Holliday a woman soul singer, who had a real bad problem with drugs? Sang around the 40's or 50's, right?
If so, I was thinking about downloading some of her stuff on ITunes....
Russ
I am playing at my school pool room which has some nice brunswick 9' btw. I'm just shooting some balls for fun. Not practice or anything, just to hit some. A guy comes up to me and says "want a couple of games"? I said "sure, why not?" He racks the 9 rack with the 9 in front and 1 in the middle. So I was like..."whatever" and just broke it anyways trying to pocket the 1 into the side. "Man that was close!!!"
He was a banger and you could tell because his cue is all shaky and had that cigar bridge. So I start some random convo just to talk and asks him how long he's been playing for..etc. He say a couple of years and that he used to play many tournaments and consistently comes in atleast in 2nd place. He continues "I haven't played for a while so I'm not that good anymore"...sure bddy. Just then the cueball ended up frozen on the rail. He casually placed the butt of the house cue between the cue ball and the rail and shooting.
what a load of crap.
He was a banger and you could tell because his cue is all shaky and had that cigar bridge. So I start some random convo just to talk and asks him how long he's been playing for..etc. He say a couple of years and that he used to play many tournaments and consistently comes in atleast in 2nd place. He continues "I haven't played for a while so I'm not that good anymore"...sure bddy. Just then the cueball ended up frozen on the rail. He casually placed the butt of the house cue between the cue ball and the rail and shooting.
what a load of crap.
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Talking about bands, we have a guy in our pool room that no matter what you've done, he's done it 10 times better (I think every pool room has one of these guys). LOL
Anyway, someone starts talking about seeing some band in concert and this guy chimes in that he's seen every major band for the last twenty years.
Just then, a Stevie Ray Vaughan song comes on the juke box and he spouts off that he had seen him about three months ago out on the west coast.
I couldn't stand it anymore and call BS. He gets totally insulted and wants to bet something because he still has the ticket stubs from the concert at his house.
I said, "Bet whatever you want because the guy died in the early '90's!"
He turned around and looked at everyone and most were nodding their heads in agreement. He turned bright red in the face and stormed out.
About an hour later, he came back in and finally cornered me and threatened me if I ever embarassed him again in front of his friends.
To which, I said, "I heard you bragging the other night about how big your dingleberry was, so why don't you go f@#k yourself!"
Apparently, he didn't think that was funny either! Some people have no sense of humor. LOL
Stones
Anyway, someone starts talking about seeing some band in concert and this guy chimes in that he's seen every major band for the last twenty years.
Just then, a Stevie Ray Vaughan song comes on the juke box and he spouts off that he had seen him about three months ago out on the west coast.
I couldn't stand it anymore and call BS. He gets totally insulted and wants to bet something because he still has the ticket stubs from the concert at his house.
I said, "Bet whatever you want because the guy died in the early '90's!"
He turned around and looked at everyone and most were nodding their heads in agreement. He turned bright red in the face and stormed out.
About an hour later, he came back in and finally cornered me and threatened me if I ever embarassed him again in front of his friends.
To which, I said, "I heard you bragging the other night about how big your dingleberry was, so why don't you go f@#k yourself!"
Apparently, he didn't think that was funny either! Some people have no sense of humor. LOL
Stones
Marilyn Manson
I was on a road trip with my two daughters and 3 of my grand kids, ages 2-12. We decided to stop for gas outside of Redding at a truck stop and take a little rest your legs break. One of my sharp eyed MTV watching grankids spots Marilyn Mansons tour bus and roadie bus. He has twoo fancy smancy Maroone Bus's at the time (about 4 years ago)
The little ones go crazy and start screaming as one of the body gaurds reachs in our van and ruffles one of my cuties hair. The mom's start to dig for camera's as Marilyn and his model girlfriend shush them as the are just waking up and don't want to be mobbed.
One of my daughters gets in line to pay for gas. The female checker leans over and says....Someone famous is in here. My daughter whispers, yeah its Marilyn Manson. He was just behind her a couple of people waiting to pay for gas. The checker looks alarmed and says real loud...."I don't even know who she is" It made my day. I wasn't so old after all.
Mike Templeton said:
I was on a road trip with my two daughters and 3 of my grand kids, ages 2-12. We decided to stop for gas outside of Redding at a truck stop and take a little rest your legs break. One of my sharp eyed MTV watching grankids spots Marilyn Mansons tour bus and roadie bus. He has twoo fancy smancy Maroone Bus's at the time (about 4 years ago)
The little ones go crazy and start screaming as one of the body gaurds reachs in our van and ruffles one of my cuties hair. The mom's start to dig for camera's as Marilyn and his model girlfriend shush them as the are just waking up and don't want to be mobbed.
One of my daughters gets in line to pay for gas. The female checker leans over and says....Someone famous is in here. My daughter whispers, yeah its Marilyn Manson. He was just behind her a couple of people waiting to pay for gas. The checker looks alarmed and says real loud...."I don't even know who she is" It made my day. I wasn't so old after all.
Several times a copy of this guy has told me that he put himself through college by playing pool, though he's out of stroke, now.vLude99 said:I am playing at my school pool room which has some nice brunswick 9' btw. I'm just shooting some balls for fun. Not practice or anything, just to hit some. A guy comes up to me and says "want a couple of games"? I said "sure, why not?" He racks the 9 rack with the 9 in front and 1 in the middle. So I was like..."whatever" and just broke it anyways trying to pocket the 1 into the side. "Man that was close!!!"
He was a banger and you could tell because his cue is all shaky and had that cigar bridge. So I start some random convo just to talk and asks him how long he's been playing for..etc. He say a couple of years and that he used to play many tournaments and consistently comes in atleast in 2nd place. He continues "I haven't played for a while so I'm not that good anymore"...sure bddy. Just then the cueball ended up frozen on the rail. He casually placed the butt of the house cue between the cue ball and the rail and shooting.
what a load of crap.
I played Earl Rodriguez here in Vegas last night. I was using my Baliboti-my dad gave it to me right after he stopped being on the pro tour, I remember when he beat Cowboy Jimmy Reid and Afro Jay Helfart back in the day for like $30,000 using that cue, Afro Jay Harfart was a little known hustler but man did my dad ever beat him, onetime my dad bet him $10,000 that if my dad won Afro Jay had to get a hair cut, if Afro won my dad got the $10,000...i'm kinda confuse about that part but anyways we often wondered what happened to Afro Jay, funny guy my dad said.
now my dad didnt use those water buffalo tips he was smarter and got the scew-on one's Gus Szambuka taught him about that, his son Benny was a hell of a guy. He would use one for the break shot and then un screw it and put on his shooting tip after he made 4 or 5 balls like everytime he broke the balls. Luckly I still have like 50 of those tip left, anyways back to Earl Enriquez he played good, I havent played anyone that good bumber pool in at least a week, I dont know who recovered that table, I haerd there was a fight among the table mechnics and the union might have a strike.
My name is Fatboy and ......."Do you think I need to lose some weight?"
now my dad didnt use those water buffalo tips he was smarter and got the scew-on one's Gus Szambuka taught him about that, his son Benny was a hell of a guy. He would use one for the break shot and then un screw it and put on his shooting tip after he made 4 or 5 balls like everytime he broke the balls. Luckly I still have like 50 of those tip left, anyways back to Earl Enriquez he played good, I havent played anyone that good bumber pool in at least a week, I dont know who recovered that table, I haerd there was a fight among the table mechnics and the union might have a strike.
My name is Fatboy and ......."Do you think I need to lose some weight?"
I get that alot around here...Cuaba said:
The bestest and baddest
Me and a couple of running buddies were banging balls in a bar one night with no real intent when a guy about 5'10" maybe 150 pounds comes in. Seems he was a pool player, had one of those cues with a hinge in it in a vinyl case. He came over and challenged the bar table, assuring us he was a fantastic player. I kicked his butt, my buddies that didn't play pool kicked his butt, I think a stray dog might have wandered in and beat him too.
Next he asked if we played chess. Off we went to his house to play chess. You know the routine. I beat him, my buddies BT and Rod that didn't play beat him, the dog, well at least I think it was a different dog this time. He admitted he couldn't win at chess either but proclaimed himself the baddest of the bad fighting. Rod is 6'4" or 6'5" and a black belt but we just nodded our heads and left. Gotta leave a man a little pride in his own house.
A few nights later he is at the same bar playing pool with two fairly large fellows when my friend BT walks in. The baddest of the bad loses, breaks down his cue stick and hits one of the guys upside the head with it. The guy looks at him, grins, and tells him he just messed up. I asked BT if he lent any assistance. "Naah, he was the baddest of the bad, no sense me getting involved!"
Busted, busted, busted, and busted. I ain't got the heart to tell y'all about the last "busted".
Hu
Me and a couple of running buddies were banging balls in a bar one night with no real intent when a guy about 5'10" maybe 150 pounds comes in. Seems he was a pool player, had one of those cues with a hinge in it in a vinyl case. He came over and challenged the bar table, assuring us he was a fantastic player. I kicked his butt, my buddies that didn't play pool kicked his butt, I think a stray dog might have wandered in and beat him too.
Next he asked if we played chess. Off we went to his house to play chess. You know the routine. I beat him, my buddies BT and Rod that didn't play beat him, the dog, well at least I think it was a different dog this time. He admitted he couldn't win at chess either but proclaimed himself the baddest of the bad fighting. Rod is 6'4" or 6'5" and a black belt but we just nodded our heads and left. Gotta leave a man a little pride in his own house.
A few nights later he is at the same bar playing pool with two fairly large fellows when my friend BT walks in. The baddest of the bad loses, breaks down his cue stick and hits one of the guys upside the head with it. The guy looks at him, grins, and tells him he just messed up. I asked BT if he lent any assistance. "Naah, he was the baddest of the bad, no sense me getting involved!"
Busted, busted, busted, and busted. I ain't got the heart to tell y'all about the last "busted".
Hu